How aware are you of the way you come across to others in a conversation? I think most of us aren’t all that aware of how the little things we say can build or crumble trust. And I believe that with a little awareness we can stop ourselves from these habits of communications without a great deal of effort.
“Success often lies not in what you do, but what you stop.” ~ William Lyon McKenzie King, former Canadian Prime Minister
The following list of 10 more bad leadership habits is from Marshall Goldsmith’s book, What Got You Here Won’t Get You There. They are following on the footsteps of my previous posts here. These bad habits can easily be turned into good ones. Which habits are you engaging in, and which would be hardest for you to stop?
- Claiming credit we do not deserve. The most annoying way to overestimate our contribution to any success.
- Making excuses. The need to reposition our annoying behavior as a permanent fixture so people will excuse us for it.
- Clinging to the past. The need to deflect blame away from ourselves and onto events and people from our past; a subset of blaming everyone else.
- Playing favorites. Failing to see that we are treating someone unfairly.
- Refusing to express regret. The inability to take responsibility for our actions, admit we’re wrong or recognize how our actions affect others.
- Not listening. The most passive-aggressive form of disrespect for our colleagues.
- Failing to express gratitude. The most basic form of bad manners.
- Punishing the messenger. The misguided need to attack the innocent who, usually, are only trying to help us.
- Passing the buck. The need to blame everyone but ourselves.
- An excessive need to be “me.” Exalting our faults as virtues, simply because they embody who we are.
It’s easy to see why these habits are common among leaders. People who are successful are often driven to win. High achievers are often intelligent, competitive, and passionate about acquiring information and applying it to get what they need.
But that’s no excuse. We can do better than that. And when we do, our leadership is more effective, much more. Do you agree? Yes, no, either way, let’s talk. Leave a comment, or call me: 704-627-4474.
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One Comment
Leadership has become a major science, based on sociometry, attracting a lot of attention as an essential tool for success in most forms of human activity, and become a subject for academic research and study. Anyone in search of “how to be a great leader” is exposed to an extraordinary volume of do’s and don’ts. Fundamentally, leadership has been with us since the dawn of man. Its roots are in tribalism, based on our herding instincts but what do we mean when we refer to “leadership”?
In my book it means acting in such a manner as to influence people to follow a predetermined behavourable pattern yielding, in most instances, rewards for those who attain the desired response.
In business, leaders often lose the way by seeking popularity rather than “leading” endeavour to the desired goal. With respect, we all suffer from these 10 bad traits but most are aware of their failings in this regard and try to suppress these vulgar behavours.